And so my overworked phone
decided to commit suicide. A few minutes before Shabbat it jumped off my pocket
head on onto the stone steps leading to my apartment. Its clumsy suicide
attempt failed, but its touch screen and my sabbatical peace were irreversibly
shattered. I browsed all the ads in the newspaper until I found my bank
account’s match: for only NIS 999 ($285 /€210) at a store-chain near home I
could get the same phone that other store-chains were selling for NIS 1299 ($370
/€270). That was a bargain!
On Sunday am, following two
dear friends’ advice, I went to try and have it fixed or have my Japanese
iPhone unlocked. I could’ve gotten the screen fixed for NIS 400 (almost half of
what I paid for the phone), and the Japanese iPhone unlocked if I dished out NIS
800 ($230/€170). The NIS 999 cell-phone looked more and more
like a bargain!
I walked in the store
full of hope, upset to part way with NIS 999 I don’t really have this year, but
excited at the thought of the new toy. Yes, there would be the nuisance of
reinstalling all the applications but it would be just a small price to pay to
be again connected to the world. If someone had told me that I was about to
waste a whole morning on what should have been, if done in honesty, a few
minutes’ transaction, I would have not believed them.
The seller gave me the advertised
phone and asked if I wanted to extend the warranty for one more year for only
NIS 200 ($57/€42). I turned his offer down, I just wanted the NIS
999-one-year warranty crappy phone. The seller, however, was determined to make
some extra cash off me, and here please admire the this man’s creativity, his
quick wit.
As I’m handing him my
credit card he informs me that on this phone Hebrew is blocked and therefore it
does not type in Hebrew.
In disbelief I tell
myself what’s the point of getting a phone that won’t write mails and messages
in Hebrew, given that most of my interactions are in Hebrew? This other one
(mind you, the exact same model but in a different color box) would type also
in Hebrew. What would the price difference be? NIS 200, and this would include
a warranty extension. I pay NIS 1200. The warranty is not valid outside of
Israel so I have no use for it if I really leave the country in June, but the
phone types in Hebrew, and that’s what counts.
Outside is pouring down as
if it were Japan during the rainy season, and the winter cold made it more
unpleasant. Walking back home it’s not the rain that’s bothering me. It’s a nudging
feeling that I had just been taken in, and this sensation becomes stronger and
stronger with every drop of rain.
My crappy phone I bought
in Italy types in Hebrew, Arabic and Greek, it could type also two variants of
Chinese if I wanted to! Why wouldn’t this one, sold on the Israeli market, not
type in Hebrew?! But why would the guy lie to me? But Android has Hebrew built
in! How could the NIS 999 one be different? No, no, it’s ok, it’s not the OS
the problem, it’s that on the other model Hebrew is blocked. The guy said so!
And I have to pay for the warranty extension! But I didn’t want an extended
warranty! It’s ok.
Home. I dry myself out,
pull out the receipt and start reading it. There is no trace of the warranty
extension on it, and the phone is the same exact model that was advertised for
NIS 999, just that here it’s marked NIS 1200. At this point I’m furious. I need
a phone. To talk myself out of returning it, I open the box and put it to
charge. Including the fraud, the phone was still cheaper than at the other
stores and NIS 200 are not a big deal. Yes, it’s not a big deal, but it’s my money!
It’s almost one week’s worth of food. But maybe the guy told me the truth. I have
only one way to find out.
With my new toy in my
pockets, I go to another store: Do you carry this model? Yes, this one
(pointing to what at the other store would have been the NIS 999 phone). Does
this model type in Hebrew? (That same “WTF is the foreigner talking about?”
look I didn’t expect to receive outside Japan.) All the models we sell here
type in Hebrew. Could there be any model in which Hebrew was blocked and
doesn’t type in Hebrew? The salesperson’s eyes have now the “Do you think I
have nothing better to do than talking with you who are not going to buy
anything?” look, but he still answered, a clear, unequivocal ‘no’ and left. On
his end no more questions taken. I needn’t any more answers.
Across the street from the
store when the ill-starred purchase was made there was another cell-phone
store, so why not? Same story as 5 minutes earlier. At this point I’m really
indignant and I walk straight into the cheater’s store. The salesperson sees me
and he’s definitely not happy. Me neither. I waited for my turn.
Where does it say on the
receipt that I bought an extended warranty?
Inside the box there is
a paper.
Here’s the paper. It
says only 12 months.
Oh, let me fix this for
you, and he starts tinkering with the keyboard, gets up, mumbles something, looks
carefully in some catalogues, grumbles, types some more, seems to go online to
look for information, types some more, and finally gives me a new, doctored
receipt.
You see, here it says
One year extra warranty. Is everything ok no?
You know, I really don’t
believe that the NIS 999 phone doesn’t type in Hebrew. Why didn’t you sell it
to me?
No! In that model Hebrew
is blocked! With the pouting face of a merchant whose honesty has been called
into question groundlessly.
Really!? Android types
in Hebrew on every phone…
No! In that model Hebrew
is blocked!
Hmmm…
Fine?
Thanks. Not really fine,
but anyway... Thank you.
And I leave. I’m in no
position to start a fight.
Outside of the store I
look at the new and improved version of the receipt: all he had done was to
mark down to NIS 1150 the price of the phone and to add one line NIS 50
warranty extension. I really saw red! The original price for the extension he
had told me was NIS 200 (by the way, the price of the extension written on the
paper inside the box was NIS 300) so this bogus NIS 50 was nothing but his way
to get rid of me ASAP before his other potential customers could have a whiff
of what was going on. So I walked back in the store.
You know, you told me
the insurance was NIS 200. How come you wrote NIS 50? Why did you lie to me?
No, the PC did not let
me change it… (Yeah, NIS 50, yes, NIS 200 no?!)
Why did you charge me
NIS 1200 for this phone that you advertise at NIS 999?
That model is locked.
Look, I don’t believe
you.
Listen, I’m telling you.
I would like to believe
you, but I can’t.
He must have been relieved
when I finally walked out. It was still raining as I walked home, but I was now
singing and dancing because I was going to do what any faithful American
Express customer would do in this situation.
And, oh boy, I slept well
that night.
It pains me to put it
this way, but… Sicily:1, Israel:0.